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Feb 3

Sandwiches for Christmas

Christmas spirit has been lost, and in turn replaced with feelings of competition and greed. The joys of Christmas are now dependent upon the types and amount of gifts children receive on Christmas morning. Of course, parents want nothing more than to make their child happy, but in order to achieve such in today’s world, one must be prepared to empty their wallets and hope for Christmas bonuses. Christmas is also a time of year for families to display their wealth, and hope that their gifts can compete with, if not trump, those of their neighbors.

In Gary Cross’s article “Modern Childhood, Modern Toys”, Cross states: “But in the nineteenth century these celebrations of indulgence were increasingly focused on the family, in parents pampering children. The shower of gifts became a way of demonstrating personal affluence” (59). Many children today seem to get whatever they ask for, resulting in a generation of spoiled children, and parents are the ones to blame. Competition drives parents into a shopping frenzy, and it seems that most families believe that overspending on your child is better than being out-shined by your neighbor.

The amount and quality of the gifts given to children today has increased in comparison to previous years, as seen by this 10-year old girl receiving a cell phone for Christmas. This girl is one example of the many kids that are now getting cell phones, ipads, and other gadgets at such young ages. Through this gift exchange, the girl is happy, and her parents are able to maintain their reputation within the community, for they are able to keep their child up-to-date with the latest trends and technologies.

Jimmy Kimmel challenged the previously discussed trend of overindulging your children with gifts on Christmas on his late night show. He asked parents to give their kids a gift they would not want for Christmas, and to record their reaction upon opening the present. As one could guess, the kids’ reactions were a combination of upset and anger. This experiment effectively portrayed the expectations children hold in regards to the types of gifts they receive, and the disbelief they have upon not getting what they want.

The vicious cycle of consumerism and competition dominate our society, and it is made especially apparent during the holiday season. It will be interesting to see the buying patterns of kids today once they reach adulthood and have to then shower their children with gifts.

Feb 3

Parents in Films and Parents at Home

According to the article Parents Under Pressure in Films (Rebecca Keegan, Los Angeles Times, Jan. 2012), “parenting – specifically parental guilt and anxiety – is the subtext of a surprisingly large number of the year-end and awards-season movies”. Parents have always been a subject of interest for filmmakers, and the resulting movies have always spoken of the time in which they were created. The “hyper-self-critical, stressed-out parents” of today’s movies reflect a “culture of self-conscious child-rearing”. This is, of course, because of a societal shift in ideas of parenting. Back in the day, parents based their techniques on their own upbringing and on instincts. Today people think, analyze, and worry much more about parenting. In today’s movies, often mothers are out of the picture and fathers are portrayed as inadequate. In one such movie, 2011’s  “The Descendants”, a father has to deal with his problematic daughters while his wife is in a coma. Kaui Hart Hemmings, author of the novel “The Descendants” says of parenting,

“My grandfather would come home and have his martini hour and engage with his kids, but then he clocked out as a parent. You don’t do that anymore. I joined this mothers group, and it was just sort of this absurd culture to me. I was overwhelmed by parenting…. The focus on having the right things and what are they eating … lactation consultants, crib consultants, I swear to God there are curtain consultants. Parenting has become this whole other culture.”

Other recent movies speaking of failed parenting or parent/child relationships include “We Bought A Zoo”, “Carnage”, and “We Need To Talk About Kevin”. The main emotion that can be gleaned from these movies is guilt over parenting and how it should (or should not) be done.

This article connects to the “Anxious Parents” reading (Peter Stearns) in the course reader in that both talk about the shifting views on and anxiety around parenting. Stearns writes that the 20th century was “a century of anxiety about the child and about parents’ own adequacy”, a phenomenon which is clearly reflected in these recent films (2). Stearns also writes that children were seen as more vulnerable, fragile, and in need of protection (3).  Parents feel that they have little control over who and what influences their children, and often believe that children will act out the images they like or are influenced by, which generates more concern about parenting (10).  Also, issues such as new technology/consumer products, fears of diseases, and changes in family structure have caused parents to feel guilty about the environment in which they are raising children (3). Parents feel a huge sense of responsibility, and thus have anxieties about how they should treat their children.

These movies play to parents’ fears of bad parenting, but simultaneously alleviate guilt by showing that other parents are also not perfect.

(Below, Trailer for “The Descendants”, 2011)

Feb 3

My Size Barbie

My Size Angel Barbie (1998)

Growing up I would have to say one of my favorite toys was the My Size Barbie. My parents bought me my first one for my birthday when I was around five or six. I named her Kimberly after the Pink Power Ranger and I played with her practically everyday. Like normal size Barbies, My Size Barbie was produced by Mattel. Now I didn’t play with Kimberly the way that Mattel probably envisioned for little girls. I would play gymnastics with her and I eventually broke one of her legs off. My parents sent her back and I got another one and still played with her rather roughly. I tried researching when the first My Size Barbie came out but I could not find the exact year. However I ran into some people selling their My Size Barbies dating back to as early as 1992. My Size Barbie was 36 inches tall and came with two outfits so the little girl and Barbie could wear and trade outfits. Mattel no longer makes My Size Barbie so I am not aware of the exact prices especially during the nineties. On eBay currently they range from $70-$200 depending on the model. Growing up I was not aware of the gender roles and stereotypes that My Size Barbie was pushing on little girls, which is probably why I played with Kimberly so unconventionally. Barbie was and still is the icon for what the “ideal woman” should be, which is beautiful, skinny, social, and mainly just concerned with her image and nothing else. As Gary Cross points out, toys throughout the centuries have been made to reflect “conventional work roles” for both girl and boy toys (Cross 49). Cross also states that the rise of dolls for girls to play with happened due to families having less children which resulted in doll play that taught “child-care skills necessary for future maternal roles” (Cross 54). Almost all my friends who were girls growing up had a My Size Barbie  and whenever they played with her they would either be princesses or mothers. In conclusion gender stereotyping of toys may not effect every child in the same way, but they continue to instill the mainstream social constructs of gender.

Feb 3

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Christmas: Is It Really About the Children?

I believe Cross’ argument about the true meaning of Christmas gifts for children. Today, Christmas gifts are not necessarily about making the child happy, or giving them the toy they’ve been waiting for all year; it’s about keeping up with the Jones’ and making sure everyone in the neighborhood knows that you are wealthy and financially stable enough to give your family everything they want and more. Of course,  children will ask for lots of things, but many parents choose each year to get their children any and everything their child could even think to ask for.

Although it’s not blatantly stated in the Sega Genesis commercial below, it’s subconsciously telling the consumer (usually a parent) that if they get this gaming system, they will be the most popular household in the neighborhood, and it will signal to all the other parents that they are the most affluent ones on the block. The children will see the new gaming system, then go home to their parents and ask why they don’t have one. In an attempt to keep the love of the child, and show off to the neighborhood, the parent will usually go get the gaming system and a variety of games, thus signaling to the rest of the neighborhood that they too are wealthy.

Plenty of emphasis is placed on who has the most money, and who is living the best life these days. While it is considered crass to simply spend money on yourself and show off with your own personal items, it is seen as socially acceptable to bestow unnecessary gifts on children, so that they can do the bragging for you. That is what Christmas has come to mean.

Feb 3

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The Best Gift I Never Received

In Gary Cross’s article entitled “Modern Childhood, Modern Toys,” he discusses the evolution of the holiday season and gift giving, and says, “The new Santa clearly represented abundance.” (Cross, 60) While I never had Santa, reading this I quickly had a nostalgic moment of being ten years old and having received so much already that I needed a gift to top them all.

My birthday and Hanukah always fell within weeks of each other so like Christian kids who had birthdays on Christmas Eve or the day after, I always felt as though I was getting screwed over only getting one set of presents.  So by my tenth birthday and tenth Hanukah I’d had enough of it, and decided that if I was only going to get one big present it was going to be the greatest present of all time… I fully intended to rid myself of my bed and replace it with an indoor bounce house. For $200 I could have as my BED what kids longed to have once a year at their birthday parties! What could possibly be better! That’s when I saw it, there, staring at me in the Sunday advertisements from Toys’R’Us was the Blast Zone Magic Castle Bounce House, seven feet by seven feet wide and five feet tall.  It was perfect.

Blast Zone Magic Castle Bounce House from www.toysrus.com

My parents had enough sense not to purchase this for me regardless of how many temper tantrums I threw. Twelve years later and without serious back problems I am relieved they didn’t.

 

Feb 3

Christmas Consumerism

The meaning of Christmas has changed drastically over the years, from plantation owners giving their slaves a small gift, to parents spending an excessive amount of money on their children to appease them.  This new meaning of Christmas has happened for a couple of reasons, one being that society is becoming a lot more materialistic, but another, and a lot more prevalent, is what Gary Cross states in, “Modern Children, Modern Toys”, that, “The shower of gifts became a way of demonstrating personal affluence.  And it did so without seeming to deny the work ethic or ‘normal’ values of thrift. (Cross 59)” To explain this, Cross believes that the reason that people are buying so many gifts and spending any amounts of money on them, is that it is a way to show your community how wealthy your are, but at the same time it is considered ‘ok’ and not snobby because it is Christmas.  I agree with Cross’ thesis that parents spend a lot of money on Christmas because it is a time where they can do so while it is considered fine.  This is clearly something that is happening in modern day culture, because we see it all over the place.  While reading Cross’ article the first thing that came to mind that backed up his thesis was the movie “Jingle All the Way” (which you can read about here).  In this movie Arnold Schwarzenegger plays a father who goes to great length fighting off policemen, a mailman, and numerous other adults just to get this action figure for his son.  In the movie his motivation for getting this “turbo man” doll, is that everyone is getting one, so to look like a good dad he must get one for his son.  While this movie goes to great extremes backing up Cross’ thesis, it does so nonetheless by showing the world this is how ridiculous we look, and this is what Christmas has come to, a battle for who can get better presents where the parents are even more happy than their children when they get the toy, Just Ask Arnold.

Feb 3

It’s a Boy!

An article in The Sun by Bella Battle, announced that the couple who kept their child’s gender a secret for five years have revealed that the child, Sasha, is a boy. They kept Sasha’s sex a secret from teachers, friends, and family members. The parents, Beck Laxton and Kieran Cooper, kept their home television-free, only allowed him to play with “gender neutral” toys and alternated boys’ clothes and girls’ clothes. They reasoned that typical gender roles create stereotypes that prevent a person’s real personality from shining through. For the first five years of Sasha’s life, he was referred to as “The Infant”. His parents decided to publicly reveal his gender when he entered grade school and when the school told them the child would have to use the designated restroom for boys or girls depending on his sex.

Laxton explained, “I just want him to fulfill his potential, and I wouldn’t push him in any direction. As long as he has good relationships and good friends, then nothing else matters does it?”

Beck Laxton and her son are laughing together while showing off Sasha’s “gender neutral” apparel.

In our class discussion, we conversed much about gender roles and popular culture. We debated, for example, why young boys may not feel comfortable reading stereotypical “girls books” while young girls do not feel the same pressure. “Books are labeled, as strictly as school lavatories, ‘Books for Boys’ or ‘Books for Girls’.” (Course Packet, P. 165) The same can be argued for toys and clothes, as we learned in our class discussion. In today’s society, when we see cargo shorts, sneakers, and baggy shirt, we tend to think male, whereas we associate dresses and the color pink with the femininity.

The article concludes by stating, “As a child grows they develop their own independent sense of self that will include their own individual gender identification.”

I believe this is extremely vital to mention. Although I do understand the point these parents are attempting to get across, I believe their son may not benefit quite as much as they hope. In today’s society, as sad as it may be, he will undoubtedly have a difficult childhood outside his own home. He will likely have a difficult time assimilating in school and in many social situations until he reaches an age where he has been better socialized (outside of the home) to develop his own sense of self. A child must have the ability to choose who they want to be. Although these parents are trying to keep their son from being forced one way or the other, they also restrict certain “extreme toys” such as Barbie and G.I. Joe. This impedes Sasha from being able to make his own decisions about what to play with and, thus, the person he wants to be. It is imperative for children to be exposed to books, clothing and toys that are geared both towards boys and girls, however, in this extreme circumstance, Sasha is likely to be confused and may even have a more difficult time developing his own sense of identity due to his parents’ seeming repulsion for it one way or another.

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